Alex 1

Alex 6

Teen Alex (Intro)

Alex 5

Alex 2

Alex 4

Teen Alex 2

Party Member
Full Name Alex Churchland
Nickname Lucky
Class Garbage Man
Race Human
Sex Male
Relationships Joel Miller: Friend

Beth Churchland: Aunt Chie: Friend

Georgy: Ally

Lester: Ally

Clarence Kripke: Former Friend

Equip Types
Weapon Types Ring
Armor Types Rags, Wraps, Flourish, Nude
Skill Types Techniques, Stances
Target Rate 100%
Evasion 5%
Hit Rate 95%
Crit Chance 4%
"No... This was my first and only chance. I had life figured out, but now it's all gone."

Alex Churchland is the main character of LISA: The Pointless. He is a Garbage Man who used to practice martial arts, like Brad, specifically "Gung-Fu" (A play on Kung-Fu). After losing an important match, Alex was forced to become a Garbage Man and then became actual garbage. In the first chapter of the game, he is looking for a better place to live.

Appearance & Personality Edit

Alex appears as an old, slightly balding man with gray hair, a gray mustache, and beard. He has green eyes and wears makeshift clothes made out of parts of other garments.

Alex is a kind, generous person. He tends to avoid fights when he can (And unfortunately he almost never can), and dislikes violence. He cares for his partner Joel's well-being, which is made evident by the players own choices, like giving him a Trauma Kit when he got injured and broke his bones, or sharing the Antique Ham between the two of them, and Lester.

History Edit

Not much is known about Alex's history. At the beginning of the game, Alex is given a Master-level Martial Arts video by his aunt, allowing him to take up Gung-Fu. He practiced for many years, then one day he decided to partake in a global tournament in Olathe, where many grandmasters also fought in. However, he loses his match against his competitor, which more or less destroys his entire future. He then becomes a Garbage Man, picking up garbage in his truck, but that doesn't work out for him, and soon becomes Homeless and is delivered by another garbage man on Garbage Island.

There, he meets Joel, who finds a bullet for his gun beneath him and thus nicknames him "Lucky." Joel decides to help Alex get out of Garbage Island, and that's where you can start playing Lisa: The Pointless.

Battle Edit

Skills Edit

Alex uses a Combo Dial as his main way of attacking, much like Brad can. He can also use Skills. His combo type is called "Velvet-fu." You can use the WASD buttons to do either normal attacks or combo them to then use a skill, which uses SP but is strong and has different effects.

Skill Name Combo Lvl SP/HP Cost
Flying Axe Kick WWD 2 30 SP
Dive None 3 10 SP
Goat Headbutt ADS 4 35 SP
Disarming Chop None 5 20 SP
Goat Kick DDD 6 50 SP, 70 HP
Full Thrust WWA 7 40 SP
Iron Hoof None 7 30 SP
The Minor Iris WAS 8 70 SP
The Major Iris ASAS 12 115 SP

Flying Axe Kick has a 30% chance of bleeding your opponent and also hits Floating enemies.

Dive allows you to dodge every melee attack but also sets you Off-Balance, and you cannot attack while you are dodging. You can, however, use items while dodged.

Goat Headbutt has 55% chance of stunning and a 60% chance of weirding out your opponent.

Disarming Chop disarms an armed opponent, severely reducing their attack, and prevents them from using skills that require a weapon such as Slice.

Goat Kick has a 90% chance to make your opponent fall, and a 60% chance to make them feel weird.

Full Thrust has an 80% chance to put your opponent Off-Balance.

Iron Hoof is an offensive skill that deals 60% extra damage to Fallen foes.

The Minor Iris is an attack that strikes three times and pierces the opponent's Defense entirely. It also removes defensive effects such as Defend (100% chance), Ironbody (90% chance) and Solid (80% chance).

The Major Iris is an attack that strikes five times and pierces the opponent's Defense entirely. It also removes defensive effects such as Defend (100% chance), Ironbody (100% chance) and Solid (100% chance).

Alex also sports two stances to regain SP:

Skill Name Sp Heal Lvl Cost
Receding Stance Base 30 3 None
Twisted Stance 70 9 150 HP (50 HP if Twisted)

Receding stance, which gives you around 35 SP per use.

Twisted stance, which gives you 70 SP per use, but costs 150 HP to use. Once you use it, you become twisted, reducing SP cost of all abilities by around 20%, increasing your Target Rate by 300%, decreasing your ATK Speed by 20 and allowing you to use Twisted Stance for only 50HP.

Battle Quotes Edit

Win Quotes Edit

  • Smooth as velvet.
  • ...
  • I did my best.

Level Quotes Edit

  • It's all coming back to me...

Drop Quotes Edit

  • Take it and let's keep moving.
  • Maybe there is something we can use?

Starting Equipment Edit

Notes Edit

  • Alex cannot die, like his pal Joel. If an attack that would usually kill a party member in Lisa: The Painful hits him, he will only get knocked out and get a permanent status effect like Brain Damage.
  • The max Exp for Alex Churchland is 10,345 Exp and him being at level 12 needing 1,160 more Exp to level up.